Thursday, December 30, 2010

Anybody Paying Attention?

Fred 'Krugger' Bertrand won the AMD World Championship of bike building with this V-rod based custom earlier this year. Completely awesome, but more to the point the best example yet to suggest that H-D has missed the fucking boat by not putting the V-rod engine into a sport bike chassis. These engines make over 100hp bone stock, but Harley has stubbornly kept them in a chassis that handles with the grace of a fat girl on ice skates. They pay lip service to the public about how they want to attract younger riders. This would be a way to do it, much more so than painting your Sportsters flat black and acting like you just reinvented the wheel. Take a break from beret shopping Willie G and get on this shit!

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Sportster Sweetness

My buddy Don sent me this bike. Don't know who built it, but it's a fine example of just what you can do with a good 5 speed XL. Just gets me itchy to get mine on the road.

Saturday, December 18, 2010

Ho, ho, hos!

Sorry for the lack of updates lately. I'm almost done with the KLR and ready to put it on the road. Then work will begin in earnest on Satan's Slingshot, soon to be the most pissed off, unholy Sportster street tracker ever unleashed on the local bagger brigade. Until then, celebrate the mythical birth of the cosmic Jewish zombie with this pic.

Sunday, December 5, 2010

A Decade of Destruction

Ten years with my girl Monica this month. It hasn't always been perfect, but she's the one that keeps me human. Only a woman with a heart as pure as hers could love a surly bastard like me for so long. Otherwise, I'd surely be in cabin in the middle of nowhere with a couple dogs, a pile of guns, and mailing letter bombs out like it was Christmas.

Sunday, November 28, 2010

The Epicness Just Keeps Coming

There are a lot of amazing places to see, and they're not in your neighborhood.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Happy Thanksgiving

Be thankful for what you do have, not what you don't have.

AND, be thankful there isn't a pack of bloodthirsty zombies on your front lawn after more than just your turkey and cranberry sauce. Not yet anyway.

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Moto Boner

Some epic shots from the KLR forum. Enough to make you want to leave all the bullshit to the rest of the world and live on two wheels forever. We're heading West and it's just a matter of time.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Oh Yeah!

I've lacked some femaledom lately, so here you go.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Preaching the Gospel

The new stickers are in my angry little hands!

Monday, November 15, 2010

BMW - Not Just for Old Farts

A couple bitchin shots for Dirty Ed from the Adventure Rider forum.

New Stickers

Any questions?

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Sunday & the Living's Easy

Great weather this weekend and a good Sunday out in the shop working on Monica's KZ and my KLR. I had my gang of four legged kids hanging out too, enjoying the sun.

Brick aka 'El Torito', the Little Bull

Big Lola

Bully, the old boy of the group.

Say Goodbye to Stock

One last look at the stock KLR before it gets the Bad Monkey treatment. I just picked up a fresh set of Avon Distanzia dual sport tires on Friday to replace the cheapies that are on it now.
The transformation has begun from boring stock to it's new life as a ZSDV: Zombie Search & Destroy Vehicle. Those undead fucks aren't going to kill themselves.

Friday, November 12, 2010

Swap Meet Time

Headed up to Charlotte tomorrow to run through the swap meet for a few hours. I'm not after anything real specific, just hunting for anything cool or a good deal. It's a good excuse to hang out with the NC crew either way.

I'll mainly be hunting for 2010 bagger parts, and looking forward to a titty contest featuring unattractive, semi-drunk women no younger than 50.

If I score anything good I'll post it tomorrow night.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

What's Worth Doing?

This. The first shot is in Utah, and the second in Bolivia. These were two of the winning photographs in the 2010 contest on the HUBB. For the uninitiated, the HUBB is the Horizons Unlimited Bulletin Board located at

HU is an entire site dedicated to long distance travel on a motorcycle. It's a great website, but I will warn you: Reading the material and trip stories, etc. on the site will likely give you the urge to abandon all the bullshit most of us fill our daily lives with, pack your bike and hit the road. For a long time.

The Joy of a Beater Bike

Got the KLR out of the truck and took my first spin around the neighborhood. There's always something satisfying about finding a running titled bike for so cheap, plus I've been wanting one ever since my trip around New Zealand on a KLR last fall. I've got a fever, and the only bikes!


Slow progress, but I got a sweet ass set of Series 413 Progressive shocks for Satan's Slingshot. 15" eye-to-eye! They've got an over/under compression spring and rebound spring. Pretty fucking sweet, plus I was able to make Dirty Ed a good deal on the Superglide Sport shocks I was going to use. Everybody wins.

KZ on the Table

The weather for working in the shop is prime, so Monica's KZ650 went on the lift for some front end therapy. It's getting a new set of fork seals and an upgraded set of tapered neck bearings to replace the OEM loose ball bearings(not the Japanese' best idea). Monica is looking forward to non-leaking forks and no more high speed front end wobble.

Saturday, November 6, 2010

It Pays to Troll Craigslist

I've had plans to get a KLR 650 for awhile, but had been looking at saving$$/selling another bike to raise the funds needed to acquire one. Lo and behold, today I am scanning the Columbia CL and this pops up. 1988 KLR with less than 17,000 miles. I go to check it out. A little rough cosmetically, but fires up and runs smoothly and has a clear title. Wait for it...........$700!! Fuck yeah. I loaded it up.

Stay tuned as I turn it into a pissed off, curb hopping, wheelie popping, two wheeled assault vehicle.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010


Sorry for the lack of updates lately. Family Reunion, then down to Daytona for a few days and now back to work. Got some good stuff coming on line soon, until then enjoy this. If church was this fun I might actually go. Taste the holiness!

Monday, October 4, 2010

Family Reunion II

Good weekend with the boys riding the hills. Excellent weather and some bitchin roads. The Kickstand Lodge where we stayed was great as well. We'll be back next year for sure. Oh, and Newton's becoming a Muslim.

Monday, September 27, 2010

Run for the Hills

Family Reunion 2 this weekend. Bikes, curvy roads, and the usual suspects. We'll miss those that can't make it, but we'll act extra stupid in their honor.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

The Times Are Changing.

I'm in the early stages of unleashing Bad Monkey v.2.0

It's about time to get back to being me and doing it like only I can. Stay tuned.

Friday, September 17, 2010

Do These Pants Make Me Look Tough?

Old Jack in 'Rebel Rousers'. A truly awful movie, but a sweet flattie chop and even sweeter pants.

Saturday, September 11, 2010

Monday, September 6, 2010

Ready to Misbehave

A fresh back tire and a wash job makes for a happy bike. Family Reunion II just under a month away and I'm ready to hit the hills.

A Boy and His Bone

Bully with his prized, and only, possession.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Go Down Swingin'

The Regulators came up short in their hometown throwdown with the Quad Squad last night, but they made them earn it. My girl played hard in the time she got on the track. There's always another bout and another fight, you just keep swinging.

How Do You Make a Moto Guzzi look good?

Put this beautiful baby next to it.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Love and a .45

Got out to the shop and got my mess from last weekend cleaned up. My swap meet special early model sportster tank won the voting and it's going on this bike. The voting was simple as I'm the only vote that counts. Fortunately, I'm not one of these weak-willed fags that has to post a pic of the tank they want to use on their bike online first to make sure everyone else thinks it's 'cool'. Anyway.

Final drive sprockets are installed, thanks in part to the easy to use kit Zipper's produces to help with the belt to chain conversion on Sportsters. I got the sprockets aligned and the wheel centered up nice.

Shop dogs. They don't work too hard, but they do a good job of keeping the right mellow mood in the air.

P.S. Remember the words of a wise man: "Son, the only two things you need in life are love, and a .45"

Jimmy Bortles, the Grouchy Master

I was lucky to enough to work with Jimmy while I was at Carolina H-D. Easily one of the best builders that most people have never heard of. I learned a lot of things from Jimmy about the right way to build a bike when I was just getting started. Every custom bike Carolina H-D ever had featured in a magazine was built by Jimmy, even though I don't think he ever got the credit he deserved for his work.

Glad to see he's still putting two wheels down in the NC backwoods. A great, laid back guy who doesn't give a damn about all the trendy bullshit in the custom bike world. A guy who still does the most badass, surgically clean wiring jobs on his bikes. And I'm not talking about simple 7 wire choppers that any dumbass can wire up. I'm talking about fuel injected, twin cam, sensors everywhere, electronic everything bikes with a wiring job that looks better than any factory's work. Jimmy's the man.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Don't Point that at Me!

Ok, you can point it at me.

The chick on the front of the latest issue of the Horse.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Rhymin' and Stealin'

Monica's out in Seattle for a few days for her little brother's funeral, I mean wedding. So, I got some shit going in the shop. I'll get some pics up, but I got a new air cleaner set-up fabbed up for my Evo so I can finally give Roadside his back (thanks brother!), in the process of making some super narrow apes for the Evo. Also got the rear wheel-trans. sprocket alignment done on the sportster and finally made my mind up to run the K Model turtle tank I got at the vintage swap on the bike.

Overall I mainly just made a fucking mess out of my shop, but sparks were flying and wrenches were spinning. It was good.
Until pics, here's three dudes. (Try to guess which one's a hermaphrodite!)

Friday, August 13, 2010

Rebel Ridin

This beast rolled into the shop as a trade in on a '76 Ironhead basket case that was for sale. Strutted, NO sheet metal, and a rabbit's water bottle for a gas tank. Hard as fuck, 250cc of absolute pissed off machine.

Sunday, August 8, 2010

Thug Life

A good shot I found of me, Roadside, and my Pops at the overlook at the top of Deal's Gap. Great day riding.